SINGLE LIFE: Day 1 & 2

So my 1 year and 2 month and 13 day relationship is over as of july 13th. My first day was horrible just not stop crying and drinking. Today I'm a lil better but the wounds are still fresh. Just hearing his voice and even turning on the T.V. And seeing his favorite movie "vampire in brooklyn" pours the salt in the wounds and silent tears roll. Break-ups I use to care less about but this one takes the cake. The one time I truely love someone and I loose them. I have learned a lot and seen a lot in the relationship and I thank him for it. Now I just have to realize the beautiful me that I am and live for me and again and find out who I am again!! I'm sad as I type but I came I saw and I conquered a lot!!

The first week is always the worst week!!

pain

I guess pain is inevitable but right now I really can't deal. I let my gaurd down to trust and love and this is wat happens. I get hurt.... Woke up out of my sleep crying cuz it hurts so much that my dreams are all about him and someone else. Can I see her no but its not me and that's what hurts. It may sound crazy to you but my dreams always come true and this is one I wish won't. I do wish him happiness and peace but it hurts to think it won't come from me. Wat is pain?? Relationships, bad friendships and so much more. It all hurts so bad but if I want to move forward I have to ask God for forgiveness and give it over to him. Its always said what God is tearing apart let no man keep together.... Well God I'm humble at your service where I should have been from the start!!!!

It HURTS now to just be SIMPLY_ME....